OK, so I stole this from Dave Barry’s blog, but it deserves the attention.

Punchline options:
A. I should say “ultra - extra strength”!
B. Take THAT, not-so-fresh feeling!
C. Mom, do you power wash?
D. SEE COMMENTS

UPDATE: I suppose it was inevitable that Wal-Mart would change it eventually, even though it was Wal-Mart *Canada*. For those of you who care, I refer you to this screenshot (which may also have been taken down by now, who knows?).

Okay, so the Rock is not actually featured in this post. Sorry, Donjuanica, I know how you love him so (you should see his screensaver…yikes).

I just watched the newly released trailer for Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince, due out around Thanksgiving, and I have to say that I’m really excited about it. It looks to be maturing and darkening and creepen…ing…just like the books did at this same stage in the overall story. I’m a huge fan of the books, but I’ve been lukewarm on most of the movie adaptations so far, which have for the most part suffered by comparison to their source material, though I will say that they’ve improved with each edition, culminating with Order of the Phoenix. In fact, here’s my overall assessment to date:

1. Sorcerer’s Stone: Great casting, great visuals, terrible acting, especially by the kids. It really needed the directing of Andrew Adamson, who worked magic with those kids in Narnia, making them really believable.
2. Chamber of Secrets: Perfect casting (especially Gilderoy Lockhart), great visuals, still some bad acting.
3. Prisoner of Azkaban: I liked it a lot on first viewing, very visually interesting, now I can’t stand it. Every time I see a little of it on TV, I want to strangle Alfonso Cuaron and the morons who selected him to direct it because of all the stupid little things he did and did not do with the project. And oh how I miss Richard Harris, who was absolutely perfect as Dumbledore.
4. Goblet of Fire: This is where things started to really improve. I didn’t love it at first, mostly because I thought there were issues with the portrayal of some characters, but on second viewing, I enjoyed it much more. Again, the casting was brilliant, especially Mad-Eye Moody, and Voldemort was very creepy looking.
5. Order of the Phoenix: This was the first one that I really loved, and I loved it even more the second time around. The casting was amazing (see Dolores Umbridge), the treatment of the book’s material was spot-on, and I finally liked the way Michael Gambon portrayed Dumbledore. Voldemort was better acted in this one than in Goblet too, not so over the top.

So I couldn’t be more pleased that they’ve brought director David Yates back after doing such an amazing job on Phoenix, and he’s also on for Deathly Hallows. But here’s the twist: they’re breaking Deathly Hallows up into two films (see article), to be filmed concurrently and released six months apart. If they’re really doing it to preserve the whole content of the book as they claim, then it could be a great decision. Time will tell.

The same holds true about another of my all time favorites that’s undergoing similar treatment. I’m very excited that they’re finally moving forward on production of The Hobbit, but they are also making two movies out of it, or rather The Hobbit and an unexpected sequel. The sequel is not going to be based on Tolkien’s actual written material, but rather on the lore that would fill the void of time between the end of The Hobbit and the beginning of LOTR. The director they’ve got on board, Guillermo Del Toro, is known for his visual style, which should lend itself to a tale like the Hobbit, so it all sounds promising so far. As much as I loved LOTR, I’m glad that Peter Jackson is producing but isn’t directing. I think Del Toro will bring a fresh take to Middle Earth.

So humongous and hearty kudos to the people behind the Harry Potter movies for finally getting the right man at the helm and keeping him there through the finish line. Here’s hoping that movies 6 and 7 (and 8, I guess) are as well done as 5 was, or even better. Based on the trailer, I’m very encouraged.

I was watching “I Survived A Japanese Gameshow” last night during a serious thunderstorm that passed over Raleigh. Never ones to shy away from a chance to use on-screen advertisements, the crack team at ABC 11 was right there with important updates which crawled incessantly across the bottom of the screen enclosed by their not-so-understated ABC 11 Accuweather Alert graphic, which of course obscured all of the English subtitles of the show.

It took me a minute, however, to realize what sage advice they were able to put together on such short notice. Observe:

The full text of the message (regarding a flash flood warning) was this:

“If flood conditions are encountered, be prepared to seek higher ground. If traveling remember turn around, don’t drown.”

You can imagine my relief to see this critical piece of information scrolling repeatedly across my TV for several hours. Thank goodness I wasn’t traveling! My first instinct would have certainly been to drown myself! Thank you ABC 11 Accuweather Alert!